MY MEMORIES OF JIM

The night I slept with my friend.

I met Jim in 1990 in a very small pub where they were having a Karaoke contest that night. Jim was in the contest. The same night I met Jim I was with another man whom I have lived with since 1982. We were sitting up to the bar as there was no room at any of the tables and Jim was sitting next to me. I introduced myself and my boyfriend and we talked about a lot of things that night. They called Jim's name to come up and sing and he ask me to wish him good luck why I did it I'll never know but I gave him a kiss on the cheek for good luck and winked as he got down off the bar stool. As I watched on this man had the most beautiful voice I had ever heard and he could make you feel what he was singing and it came from his heart. He ran chills up and down my spine. When he was finished the whole house applaued and cheered him on. I couldn't help myself but the man completely had captured me.

After the evening had ended I gave him a hug and another kiss on the cheek and said goodbye and hoped to see him around again sometime. On our way home (my live in boyfriend) asked me if I would like to have a threesome with him, I gave him a dirty look and asked him why he even would think of such a thing, after all isn't it every man's dream to have a threesome with another female not a male the subject got dropped immediately.

We had been back to that small pub several times since then not really my choice but my boyfriends and why I don't know to this day. We ran into Jim once again and this time my boyfriend sat next to him and carried on a conversation as for me not to hear what he was talking about but I had it figured he was trying to sell me but not as a prostitute to Jim. As time went on we keeped running into Jim and Jim and I became real good friends. Plenty of times when I was out and about on my own I would run into him also and he ask me to go for a cup of coffee and I did. Jim never and I mean honestly never made a pass at me all the time I was with my livin boyfriend. But I won't say I wanted him too. Jim got so he would even call the house and talk to my boyfriend a lot, till one day he had asked us to meet him at a different pub where he was in another contest, he didn't want to go but told me to go ahead and go, I felt very uncomfortable about this we just didn't go to pub's without each other at all, in fact he turned around and got on the phone and told Jim to come and pick me up. I was in total shock that he would even do this. Well as it turned out I had found out he had been cheating on me and I guess you can guess it from here this was his way of slipping out some where else with her.

When I had found this out I had leaned on Jim and confided in everything with him I shared my secret thoughts and my whole life with Jim. But I wasn't ready to give up on the man I thought I was in love with. This went on for 10 years. Somewhere along that 10 yrs Jim got his own show together and I helped him out one day I asked him to teach me to sing I had tried but it was awful and I wouldn't try without first learning. Jim took a lot of time with me and taught me to sing I told my boyfriend about it and he just would laugh, well he started coming back into the pub where Jim and I was working from time to time and check us out (probably was having problems with his cheating female so I suspect) Jim kinda thought so too. He did tell me how proud he was that I learned to sing.

Everything seem to be going great again between us (boyfriend) till one day I came home from doing a show with Jim and the whole house had been cleaned out. I got into my car till I found the bastard he had moved in with his whore. This all happened in April of 2000. Still 10 yrs and Jim had never made one single pass at me.

Around July of 2000 was the change of my life Jim and I went to do a show as usual but a lot of his friends were there too after we walked in they took over told me it was cut loose and party time with an old friend of mine named Jim....they set the show up and I was seated on a barstool along side of Jim we drank southern comfort and sevenup and done hotdamn shots...a good share of the night we toasted to everything under the sun..when Jim got up to use the rest room one of the bar tenders keeped coming over to e telling me how much Jim was in Love with me and had been for years but would never say anything.....we'll to make a long night story short Jim and I were pretty well loosened up so to speak of and his friends decided neither one of us was fit to drive....they had made arrangements at a motel for the two of us and drove us their...now to rush this let me tell you I didn't believe the bartender at all I'd seen Jim in action he liked all the ladies and was friendly with several (but never took one home) and I got to admit several times a littel jeousy rose up in my mind, soemtimes I imagined him flirting with me like that but it never happened Jim was just that Jim to me my best friend in the whole world.....he was always there for me listened, cried when I cried but never did he tell me how to make the choices in my life.....

Off to the motel we were escorted by Red...another good male friend of mine...and he told us to sleep it off he would pick us back up in the morning.....Jim took me by the arm and led me to our room he opened the door and I said oh no twin beds we said twin beds didn't we and Jim said yeah we did and just looked on and laughed so I started to laugh too...I told him I think this was planned somehow...he didn't say a word....I fell back on the bed with my clothes on and continued to laugh...Jim said well we can just sleep in our clothes how's that I said Ok sounds good to me....we were laying their and Jim ask if he could kiss me.....I giggled and said your always kissing me he said no I mean really kiss you like the woman that you are....he got near my lips and I couldn't help it I burst out laughing again....and ask if he was trying to seduce me he said no of coarse not so Igot up and said well let me help you then....I turned around with my back to him and unlipped my pants ever so slow looking over my shoulder watching him watch me.....and down they fell to the floor...very slowly I unbuttoned my white silky blouse and slipped it ever so slowly off my shoulders still watching him still with my back to him then I sat slowly doen on the edge of the bed and told him to cuddle up close to my back and bring his hands around to my abdominand told him I'm all yours....he was ever so gentle and carressed ever spot on my body...we managed to get him out of his clothes, too I had never been kissed like he kissed me and held like this in my whole intire life...I had no inhibitions about myself that niht I did things I thought I never could or would do with a guy...we made love till morning..holding on to each other all night the words of love were never spoken between us.....this man I neverr new till this point took care of me in more ways then the book was written for 101 ways to amke love and satisfy your partner......Red came back and picked us up in the morning as promised and we were still holding each other...we were taken back to our cars and sat in my car for a while and leaned over and kissed me again and just smiled and told me I was something else and he would never forget it ...he asked me if I was sorry that it happened I told him no I was glad it had happened.....after a week had passed I can honestly say I wass not in lov with him as he was with me but I never told him that he was my best friend still throught the years till he was killed in 2003...I miss my friend and he always sang "You Had Me From Hello" to me at every show we did.....I wrote a peom about my friend and it's posted below this...his exwife knew about our relationship and she placed the poem at the head of his casket......I leaned over and kissed him goodbye one more time but my memories are very fond of him.....and to this day I do believe that yes I was in Love with him but never knew it and I stayed with him till the end....I can stillhere his voice sing this song.....


You Had Me From Hello ------Kenny Chesney
One word, that's all you said
Somethin' in your voice caused me to turn my head.
Your smile, just captured me
And you were in my future as far as I could see
And I don't know how it happened, but it happened still
You asked me if I love you, if I always will
Well you, had me from
"Hello"I felt love start to grow
The moment that I looked into your eyes, you won meIt was over from the start
You completely stole my heart
And now you won't let goI never even had a chance you know
You had me from "Hello"Inside, I built the walls
So high around my heart, I thought I'd never fall
One touch, you brought it down
The bricks of my defenses scattered on the ground
And I swore to me I wasn't gonna love again
The last time was the last time, I let someone in
But you, had me from "Hello"I felt love start to grow
The moment that I looked into your eyes, you won meIt was over from the start
You completely stole my heart
And now you won't let goI never even had the chance you know
You had me from "Hello"That's all you said
Somethin' in your voice caused me to, turn my head
You had me from "Hello"You had me from
"Hello"Girl I've loved you from "Hello"

JIM

Who was this Man
He was a man who didn’t have much but he had a lot to give
He was a man who loved but didn’t expect much back
He was a man who lived a life of happiness something money couldn’t buy
He was a man who sang from the heart and his voice was well heard
He was a man who walked a life of truth and trust
He was a man who’s heart was richer than gold
He was a man who wasn’t left behind but to touch your life
He was a man who God called home
He is the man who waits for you
He is the man who will greet you
He is the man who will welcome you to his new home
He is the man who will sing again
He is the man who will show you a life beyond what is expected
He is the man who will give you love again
He is the man who has it all and still has a lot to give
He is JIM